Be an advocate this February

02.03.2010

This February marks the first annual National Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month (TDVAM). Are you looking for ways to get involved and be an advocate this month? Here are a few ways for you to be an advocate and speak out against teen dating violence:

• Acknowledge how often violence against women occurs in literature that you read for class. One example is To Kill a Mockingbird, which features a case about brutal rape. While we hope that you read the book (especially if it’s for a class assignment), we hope that you also bring to light the violence depicted in the book and explain to your classmates how this behavior is not okay.
  
  
• Read blogs and websites that provide information about teen dating violence. A few websites that we recommend are www.loveisrespect.org, www.thatsnotcool.org and www.padv.org.
  
  
• Advocate for an assembly at your school to talk about teen dating violence and building healthy relationships. Get some friends together and ask your teachers and school administrators how to make it happen!
  
  
• Talk to a friend about teen dating violence. Since most teens may not go to a parent or teacher for help, let your friends know that they can talk to you about their relationship with their boyfriend or girlfriend.
  
  
• Invite a speaker to speak at your class, youth group, team outing or study group. To schedule a speaker from PADV, call 404.870.9600.
  
  
• Print out a resource list for teens and distribute it at school and in your community. Check out www.loveisnotabuse.com for some great resources.
  
  
• Make a note of songs and music videos that depict violence against women. After making the list, don’t listen to songs that have bad messages or lyrics.
  
  
• Write a letter thanking your Senate representative for their support of this year’s National Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month initiative. To learn who your Senate rep is, click here.
  
  
• Encourage your parents or guardians to learn more about teen dating violence. Check out PADV’s website under the Teen Dating Violence section and click on “For Parents.”
  
  
• Don’t watch TV shows that promote violence, especially violence against women. Some
  
  
• Register and attend PADV’s Spotlight on Teen Dating Violence: What’s Your Role? To learn more about this summit, click here.

What are other ways that you can advocate for teen dating violence? Share your ideas here and with your friends, family and community!

How dating violence affected me

1.14.2009

I’d like to pose a question to everyone reading this blog: how has teen dating violence (TDV) affected you?

My name is Jil and I work for PADV as the teen prevention advocate. I talk with teens in their schools or community groups about building healthy relationships. I also warn teens about dating abuse and what to do in the event that teen dating violence is affecting them or their friends. Before I started working in this field, I didn’t know a lot about teen dating violence. I thought that it was something that only a few teens had to deal with. Looking back, teen dating violence was present in my life when I was younger. But I thought that the warning signs I saw were just a normal part of relationships during high school. At the time, I wasn’t looking for warning signs because I wasn’t really paying attention to the people around me and their relationships; especially if I didn’t know them really well.

Now than I know about teen dating violence and recognize how it was present in my life when I was a teen, I wish that I would have done something for those couples that were having shouting arguments in the hallway at school or the girl from gym class who showed some bruises that she got from her boyfriend. I could have even helped a friend of mine whose boyfriend slapped her and pushed her into lockers.

Dating violence doesn’t discriminate based on age, race, gender or sexual orientation. I wish that I had realized that more when I was a teen. Even though I was not in violent relationships as a teen, I should have been an advocate for those who were and told them that everyone deserves better than a relationship that is built on violence and abuse.

So, I’m wondering has teen dating violence has affected you? Has someone you know been abused by their dating partner? What can you do, or what have you done, to help?

If you’re ever looking for information about teen dating violence or other forms of abuse, check out our website.